Random FMA
by darkangeltears06
Summary: Random FMA stuffs...first fanfic....this is what happens after too much chocolate...enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Ed, Al, Winry, Roy, Ria, Hues, Wrath, and Lust were all locked in a room.

"What the hell?" Ed said, " what kind of dumb story is this?"

"I have the power to kill you off so just shut the hell up!" narrorator screams.

"I'm bored, I want Mom" Wrath whined.

"Awww! Your sooooooo cute!" Winry said with starry eyes.

"Yay! Your nice...can I call you sissy?" Winry's eyes turned to hearts.

"YAY! I have a little sister!"

"I'm a boy"

"Brother! I mean brother." Then there was an akward silence.

"So..." Roy said, trying to start a conversation ," Lust, are those things real?"

"What 'things'" Lust asked.

"Your...(cough)...boobs." An anger veined appeared on the middle of Lust's forehead.

"I wonder wich of the three girls is bigger?" Ed asked.

"You've got to be kidding me," and pissed off Riza said.

" Edward I cannot believe you just asked that!" Winry shouted.

"Could we at least see?" a curious Al asked.

"What the hell, Al? Your supposed to be the innocent one!" Winry said.

"I just want to know..." Out of nowhere, Roy pulls out a measuring tape.

"TIME TO END MY CURIOSITY!" Roy shouted and measured all three girl's breasts. After being slapped multiple times, he reported the answers. "Lust's are the biggest! Then Winry, then Hawkey," he finished.

"WTF? Winry is younger than me and hers are bigger!" Hawkeye screamed,"measure again!" With much enjoyment, Roy measured again.

"Results are the same," he said. Hawkeye pouted. Winry started poking Lust's boob.

"How do you get them so big?" she asked.

"GOD WINRY! Your acting like a lesbian!" Ed shouted.

"I am not a lesbian! I'm just curious."

"Then proove it!" Instead of Winry coming over and kissing Ed as he hoped, she went over and made out with Roy.

"BITCH!" Hawkeye screamed.

"Your just jelous that my boobs are bigger than yours!" Winry shouted.

"THATS IT!" Hawkeys screamed and tackeled Winry. Winry started pulling her hair. Riza did the same. Finally they ended in a slap fight.

"GO SISSY!" Wrath screamed. After watching enough of the fight, Al pulled the two girls off of eachother.

All of the sudden, Izumi appeared out of nowhere. "I have bigger boobs than the both of you! whahahahahaha!" Then she vanished. Both girls just stared at thin air where Izumi and appeared and vanished, and the fight was over.

"I have a question," Al started ," The author said Hughes is in the story, but where the hell is he?" Everyone started looking around until they found him huddled in a corner with a picture of his daughter.

"Wait a second, somethin doesnt seem right here..." Ed started. He reached a hand to Hughes' shoulder and went right through him.

"WTF! I just went right through him!" Ed yelled.

"WTF! He just went right through me!" Hughes screamed.

"WTF! I killed him!" Envy shouted, appearing out of no where than disapearing again.

"WTF! Where am I?" Chuck Norris said, popping out of thin air.

"WTF! Chuck Norris!" Winry said, beating Chuck Norris up with her wrench.

Then the room filled with sleeping gas and everyone collapsed.

"What kind of sucky ending is that?" Ed asked.

"This is not the end...I have much more planned out for you. Now go knock yourself out!" Narrorater screams. Ed does as he's told and soon there is a room filled with sleeping Fma characters.

Fin...For Now


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Everyone woke up. It took a minute for them to realize where they were. Hughes was still huddled in his corner with his picture and a pile of bloody Chuck Norris in another.

"Shit, we're still here," Ed said and everyone groaned.

"What should we do?" Al asked. Suddenly Roy got a devilish smirk on his face.

"We could play Dare!" he said with pride.

" I thought it was Truth or Dare," Riza replied.

"Well you could just dare someone to tell the truth." So soon all of the characters were gathered in a circle, except Hughes who was still hovering in a corner. "Alright, I'll start!" Roy said, " Lust I dare you to go kiss Chuck Norris!"

"But Winry beat him up, he's all broken and stuff," Lust said.

"So..." Roy repleid. So Lust went to the pile of Chuck, found his head, and kissed it.

"Alright Wrath, I dare you to dye your hair orange!" Lust said, pulling out a pack of orange hair dye. The now orange haired Wrath scoweled.

"Sissy, I dare you to flirt with Ed!" Wrath said giggling. Ed blushed madly as Winry crawled over to him.

"I think alchemist are sexy! I think you are sexy." Winry said in a very seducive tone. Ed was turning a bright shade of red. " Your hair is sooo hot." She said running her fingers through Ed's hair. She then brushed her lips against his forehead.

"Ahh! Okay, dare's over, your turn Ed! Skip sissy!" Wrath yelled. Ed was still blushing as Winry giggled and went back to her spot.

"Okay, I dare Mustang to kiss Hawkeye!" Ed said triumphantly. Without any fight put up, Riza and Roy wre in a deep kiss. They watched for 5 minutes until everyone got bored of that.

"Well since they're busy, I guess I get to go!" Al said. "I dare narrorator to turn me into a human!"

(Narrorator types something)

poof

"I'm a real boy!" Al screams. "I need to feel something! I want to feel a boob!" Winry covered her chest while Riza is still kissing Roy. That left Lust.

"Go ahead, people do it all the time," she said, pointing at her boob. Al ran over there but before he could feel it, Heman came and started beating the living shit out of him.

"OMG! Its Heman!" Ed screamed.

"Damnit! Whats with all the non-FMA characters!" Winry shouted, pulling out her wrench. She did to Heman just as she did to Chuck Norris and put Heman over in the corner with the pile of Norris. Once again, the cheap narrorator didn't know how to end the chapter so she fills the room with sleep gas. Quickly all the FMA charactors feel into a deep sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"I am bored," Ed declared after everyone woke up.

"Its tiring getting knocked out over and over again," Al said.

"How long have we been down here?" Lust asked.

"42 hours, 15 minutes, and 23 seconds," Hueghes said quickly.

"Whoah, you talk," Wrath said.

"I need a new hairstyle," Al admitted.

"Yes, you do," Roy and Hawkeye shouted at the same time.

"I want...A MULLET!" Al screamed. So, Riza got out her scissors and gave Al a mullet( yes she knows how.) "Awesome," Al shouted. There was a very long scilence since the narrorator had writers block, very mad and annoying writers block.

"So," Roy said, "Hows the weather been?"

"I wouldnt know, we haven't been outside in 2 days," Lust responded.

"True..."

"Sissy, I'm bored!" Wrath whined.

"I have an idea," she said and whispered something in Wrath's ear. Randomly, Winry knocked Ed out with her wrench. "Lets put makeup on him!" she giggled. 5 minutes after that, Ed was fully coated with makeupt, looking like a geisha.

"We should dress him up!" Hues said, finally out of his corner. Everyone hesitated to change him, except Winry that is.

"I've seen him in his boxers tons of times." she said. Of course, Ed had to regain conciessness right as Winry was taking off his shirt.

"huh...WHAT THE HELL WINRY! YOU WHORE!" He screamed. Everyone ooed.

"What did you just call me?" Winry asked, teeth clenched.

"Oh shit.."

"FIGHT! FIGHT!" Everyone shouted.

"No! Dont encourage her!" Ed screamed. But it was too late, Roy wrang the bell to start the match and Winry pulled out her trustworthy wrench. The match lasted 20 seconds until Ed lay on the ground, blood pouring out of him, lying unconciess.(is that how you spell it? the chocolate is getting to my english)

Suddenly Barney appears out of no where. "I love you Al!" He announced. Al started to run, but Barney hugged him and they both get sucked into the twilight zone.

"Shit, I didnt get to beat him up." Winry sighed.

"Shit, how am I going to explain this to my lawyers?" Narrorator says. She quickly fills the room with sleeping gas before escaping to Mexico.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Everyone woke up (once again) with the backstreetboys surrounding them. Everyone screamed, including the preppy boy band.

"What are you preps doing here!" Winry demanded, pulling out her wrench.

"OMG! Its Ed!" They all said at the same time.

"Stay away from me!" Ed shouted.

"OMG! He's even hotter in person! We need you in our band! Our fans love hot guys like you!"

"Are you guys gay?" Riza asked.

"Of course!" They all responded.

"No way in hell am I joining you preppy boy lovin' sucky singing horny band!" Ed screamed and hid behind Hughes.

"Aww...What about Al? they asked.

"He and Barney got sucked into the twilight zone." Wrath explained.

"OMG! Al got to meet Barney! Lucky!"

"Arg! Die you bitches!" Winry shouted pulling out her wrench. Riza also started shooting them to, just for the hell of it. Soon there were more corpses to add to the pile of Norris and Heman.

"That was scary..." Ed said.

"I'm never buying my daughter that cd." Hughes said.

"Now what," Lust said ," The stupid narrorator put the main plot of this pathetic chapter at the very beginning."

"Smart, Narrorater" Roy said sarcastically.

"Shut up! All of you! I'll kill you! I'll KILL YOU!" Narrorator screams while spazzing.

"She's had too much caffine today," Wrath whispered. Suddenly Al and Barney appear back again.

"SEE! I had more to happen!" Narrorator shouted.

"Al your back!" Riza said. Winry pulled out her wrench and killed Barney and throws hime to the pile of corpses.

"Those bodies are starting to smell," Al commented.

"Lets burn them!" Roy shouted, pouring a bottle of alchahol on them and snapping his fingers. They all watch in amazement as the bodies burn. The narrorator fills the room with tear gas this time and as they all start crying, fills it with sleeping gas.


End file.
